Haumea ʻĀ

the forest dweller's net.
photo credit: Ama Lilly

Pure and free potentiality lightly lifts from topsoil reaching deep.

Ancient Haumeaʻā white gold mesh net of endless doorways spun over epochs

still here off the house pad at the edge of old-growth forest.

A steppingstone across an endless river spanning epochs, spanning epochs.

Her backbone soft

holding every living thing up

now giving in to bare feet sinking deep into

emerald green carpet of moss releasing

clear rainwater slowly rising between toes

browning more in tea-colored layers with

each step into rain that fell all last night long.

Rain that misted ever so lightly onto

sleeping ears listening intrinsic through

sluicegates where sorrow flows in and out like tides at the makahā,

where learning glides in deep dreaming cadence rising and falling in the

chest with strong teaching free of constraint.

We sank into surrender…

I completely encircled you in my arms 

and whispered to your ear, “there is no struggle;

lean back and let us ride upon the deep, rich soil.

Fall down the cliff in slow waves of release. Look now;

                                                we have arrived at the bottom.”

The moist earth warm beneath us

offered invitation to rest in sweet affinity.

Tingling drops from airborne river of

rain tickled awake the neural network of

my mycelium mind branching understanding to

rain falling into the forest of me,

                 she teaches me…in dreams she teaches me.

Her gentility feeding stardust sustenance kept alive

since origin time way before the afterthought of mankind.

This shooting star of a lifetime sends sprinkling edges of sparkled light down lines of the

universal ʻupena tossed out widely into the cobalt blue sky expanding…

Message tinkling down those lines from above to

this good earth….this good earth

I consider the eventual need to

ever rest back into this net imbuing the soil outside my window.

How she will envelop me soft like brown mochi breasts

transformatively preparing me for the

journey beyond.

Subsumed back to the underworld doorway

Decorated with the lichen and those who travel on sporal feet

                Dripping green footprints of maidenhair and palapalai

softly dancing in the blowing breeze

Taking me up through roots sewing me to plants, trees…to trees.

                       The long return to complete the cycle beyond

the smallness of mind.

Back to Haumea…

servitude of all I have

back to the greatness

of it all.

Unto the Morrow

May the very best of everything good

Come now and ever

Unfold in perfect timing.

May end of day golden hour sunlight

Wash glittered bronze on

Cheekbones into sparkle eyes.

May soothing evening breeze repetition

Lift heart’s loving prayer

Ascending for you…to you.

May delving toes find soft, shallow pockets of

Cool earth as sunset

Deepens somewhere beautiful.

May expansive horizon welcome your

Lean back like baby’s

Ease into Grandmother’s lap.

May peace unfolding in hearth fire’s glow

Send glinting sparks to

Early evening starry sky…

May perfect medicine brim inward like

River bend flowing

Over gemstones a-shimmering.

May dreamy flowing full of life

Diving to pick up

Treasures lost now found again.

May dreams rise and fall then taper off to

Horizon clouds tinged

Rose-gold in low procession.

May light infuse the interlude of sleep

Stretching in search of

Comforting pockets of warmth.

May a perfectly steeped cup of tea lift

Like mist rising on

Emerald cliffs full of rare and precious.

Know that I love you…know that I love you.


Life is dawning all around.

In Ritual with the Land; Come Along…

offering at the edge of sacred ground…

My very first podcast interview ever!! https://www.wishbeads.com/blogs/wishbeads/kananiaton

In very early January of 2020, extra heavy rains fell on the old but restored roof of a historic house along the Wailuku River of Hilo…swelling the river to record-breaking heights. So much so that we were grateful for the craggy, black, monolithic lava rock that hemmed in that water phenom.

In the dry center of the beautiful old house a gaggle of women writers convened and laughed and cried….and wrote and shared…and ate and sipped…and ritualized and concocted. We forecasted and debriefed…we sang and created. Each had her moment to blend custom-fit medicine for the unfolding bloom of exposed vulnerability that came in perfect timing though we did not anticipate it coming for us.

Toward the last few days of the retreat, even as the soggy ground had so much more saturation to deliver to the deep chambers of holdings within Papahanaumoku, Mother Earth, the sun came out, and I saw deeply into the dark, deep but dazzlingly washed clean spaces in between the forest surrounding. Though every shade of green caught sunlight luminously, I still saw a doorway beckoning me into the vast depths of the darker spaces in between…where the deepest greens were held…almost black like the matte black coat of the wild pigs disappearing as they ducked quickly into hiding. It was a doorway to the spaces unseen, the blindspot of our everyday vision. I saw it as a chance to press into into the mansion of my subconscious, to deeper understandings presenting me a link to my subconscious, my teacher, my heart of hearts. An invitation to sit upon the dirt floor of my inner sanctum where nothing is ever needed because everything is already there in minimal surroundings…ready to be pulled out in full teaching for remaking anew this life of mine…of ours.

What a special time! In the midst of it all, a podcast was recorded with the rain falling into it. Give it a listen…make a cup of tea first for sustaining you along this pathway to lovely ritual in high places of wilderness and collective gratitude. It takes a while to get to a chugging flow of insight…be patient and wait for it if you can…Love you!

Link to Podcast: https://www.wishbeads.com/blogs/wishbeads/kananiaton

Ever Becoming…A Daily Practice.

I’m pictured here with Molly Masaoka, Yoga Kumu extraordinaire. And boy! Has she has been put through the wringer with all the change away from our fundamentally crowd-based Hawai’i economy to the COVID-free online economy.  At her request, we came together on the August moonphase of Muku, the last night of the cycle, to do a cleansing ceremony to properly close her studio. The ceremony included looking forward on the cusp of the new Hilo moon phase rising,  the beginning of the next moon cycle.

Muku: to cut short, end, cut off. Hilo, to weave, braid, begin to bind; also a reference to the crescent shaped Hilo Bay front just a little way down the street from her boutique and studio. She is closing these street-front doors and elevating to the second floor of the same building…3 times the space, more windows, more light, more salt-mist breezy airflow, more room for her students to safely practice…and for the business model addition of a state of the art recording studio. I’ve witnessed her pivot, flex, fall, turn and redesign so much in the last few months, heck the last 18 years here!

…and ever has she risen like a CHAMP. So proud of her, so much love for her! There is nothing to fear. Everything will be okay.

love you Molls edited“…So much inscribed on the walls of the chambers of your Yoga Centered hearth…so many affirmations, insights, humble prayers of deep hope that quietly pulsed through each student’s inner chamber as we trained the breath…lifting, connecting, expanding to greater realities of who we truly are…and then always inspiring our next level of becoming.

So many answers revealed all this journey long, and yes, as of late, the truth of what is meant to ascend with your next level evolution. How great the calling of your soul to level up with only true love, authentic relationship, and upright, solid connection to the mission of Yoga Centered, your community, our yoga and our Hilo ‘ohana.

So many have come and filled their cup at the natural flowing spring of health and wellness here. Many have laid back in surrender and felt the long-ago comforting memory of easing into the lap of Grandmother Earth waiting for us in savasana…and from the humble, simple beating heart of hearts, new prayers have lifted to the consciousness of our awareness at the close of practice…words like: can we come back tomorrow?

So many times have I collapsed on my mat wondering if I can even do this practice, but gently….ever so vigorously even, have I risen to the moment and opened my heart wider than I realized I could…heartbroken to heartopen, heart rising, heart lifting, heart speaking only to myself until tears flow through my practice…and not ever expecting it, my yogi sister, yogi brother reaching gently to hold and press their lotus fingers into my hand resting on my mat. Just holding me while I healed…holding me while I healed in this beautiful community…this beautiful community.

Let us rise together. I will see you there. Let us inscribe the best practices learned here upon the walls of the wider, more open, expanding hearth chambers above…see the prayers, the chants, the music, the affirmations, the love, the love, the love written on the walls of the new chambers of the hearth of YogaCentered…come, let us lift up total well-being in the heart of Hilo.

Such an honor, a privilege to be part of you and you with me. Love you loving me loving you.

I greet the dawn in you….namaste.”

Ihola, Into Within

969758_10200973341207263_990940574_nHuli a nana ihola

Make time for inner introspection

E ho’i iho no

Inner descending


Spiral down upon the ancestral knowledge inherited

Ho’olohe…kani ha ola

Listen for the breath of medicine

Ku kani loko

Hear now the resounding drum of heart.

A, i waena ha, kani, ho’olono, ka pule kānaenae ola

There, between breath, amid heartbeat, the traveling sound of silent message, the message from deep within…

A ‘oia. E ho’eu’eu. Holo!

There it is. Activate. Move!



In that slow benevolent pace known only to

River rocks and old springs I exhale.

Beautiful effortless release in

Perfect time the last line of

Chants offered centuries here.

Such simplicity in breath anchored

Profoundly from upwelling heartspring within.

Deep green bundle of akua embodiment

Floated off fingertips to uppermost swell of

Kanaloa ocean reaching up the rocky shore.

Tightly bound ti leaves holds so much supplication,

Such honest intention for a better way forward.

Drawing back in easy tumble the

Offering rolls into the arms of Puna ocean.

Transported deeper to the

Bosom now out of sight we

Offer up gratitude in poetic songs that

Have been sung for ages.

Thank you for receiving our gift and

Request. Sincerely, thank you.

Light rain starts falling as the

Horizon brightens to pink and gold tones

Pushing back the colbalt blue cloak of pre-dawn.

We walk back from the cliff so hopeful,

Trusting the omens gorgeously unfolding telling us:

In this time of tumult and such painful breaking, where

Broken roadways are now covered in

Hardship of unpassable sharp edged lava rock,

The answer to your plea…embedded within the food of

The offering was perfect catalyst for movement in the universe.

Know that there are many ways to resolve this struggle.

It may appear so limited in outcome, but

Know that there is way 3, way 4, way 5.

Wait for it and know, the source of your heartspring works now

And evermore…so much is coming…

…And honestly, now 8 months later,

It has finally arrived in wholeness and contentment

I thought would not be possible.

It is here, a perfect birthing of a

New reality unexpected and so much

More than ever could have been singularly imagined.

So grateful. So relieved. So joyful this

Full circle from heartspring into

An outcome so long hoped for.

So deeply grateful.



Photo credit: Kai Markell

This ancient story…an old parable, really,

Lays wait in a dusty box

Silently resting in that hidden corner within.

Light uprising every now and again

Sourced from the most powerful force of the Heart is

Breaking open in the agonizing losing, then finding.

Heartbreaking losing, then uplifting finding…

Over and again bringing forth obstacles to transcend

Face and look into the trespass…find a way to surrender; understand.

On my knees, slow it down, in the anguish of the breaking;

Voice of the heart says, “More, I can grow more.”

The rip and tear builds strength, resilience, indeed, brilliance shines through.

Expansive light of awareness, illuminate the parable again;

Glittering ember of the soul, my diamond, my temple…

Golden lotus of the heart answers: “trust me.

Come here, with me, close your eyes to open the third;

See, and let me show you again, and then

Once more, how divine the wisdom so quickly forgotten.”

Life evermore asks that while you suffer, let beauty in…

Though it aches, listen…this heartbeat grows…stronger, clearer.

Coherently hear sweet, beautiful truth unfolding.

Get ready for the next forgetting and know this:

Find a way to put love in your wholehearted words of supplication

…and I will come home.

KA 1/18/19

Golden Lotus Heart Rising


Slow and steady, I force the release of my breath to

Extend and lengthen though my

Heart pounds in my ears and

Sweat beads profusely..

Dripping to the floor in

The space between my feet.

I push each twist a little harder each time,

Extracting more salt water from within—

Yoga is a squeezing my body like a sponge.

Summer heat in the studio means gratitude in the slightest

Island breeze wafting in…

Carrying the pungent aroma of sizzling meals laden with

Exotic spices from neighboring restaurants.

But my awareness is focused tightly on

Each moment passing with

Deliberate breath sipped into the body

Then let out with stretched effort.

The cacophony of voices within unravels,

Slows down to an easier conversation about what I really want:

A little bit of strengthening each day,

An accumulation of mana.

Right there in the spaces where the tightness and inflexibility are.

Delicious stretches that stop right before pain.

Moving out that which needs to go,

Filling in with strength and perfect medicine from the inner pharmacy.

The ego starts to surrender and effortlessness begins to unfold.

I step into the mystery of an expansive inner salt water ocean, and  

Arrive at the heart of hearts.

Lay down upon the shores of compassion for myself,

And move into the final resting pose.

Lavishing in perfect remedies dispensed from the wise healer in me,

I close my eyes and see

Cobalt blue and indigo colors shift and glimmer…

I rest and let go…

I find a little request surfacing from

The subconscious pond of my mind in the

Last meditative moments…asking

For enough energy to come back tomorrow.

Heart of mine…thank you for being such a devoted teacher.

~ KA 7/8/17

Kapule, Pa’akai o Kaua’i



He hali’a aloha keia:

The weathered charter school van  

Interrupts the smooth and polished diamond morning of

Upscale Aliamanu neighborhood with

Quite a lot of noise and rambunctious energy.

Lesson plan in his head, small pile of fishing gear next to his driver’s seat,

Kapule is ready to teach this holoholo day.

His loud assistant’s sassy diva attitude keeps the raucous volume high as the

Small ragtag group embarks on an overgrown trail almost hidden between

Exclusive and heavily secured beach front homes.

Says the mahū assistant: “public access trails like this are tolerated by the wealthy.

The public has every right to access the ocean, it is a natural resource for all to enjoy.

In odda words, they no can block us from the ocean in front of their homes so no forget about this trail…use em! And continue to use em!”

At the foot of the trail, they step out of their worn slippers and

Sink their toes into the cool, moist morning sand…turn their faces into the breeze offshore.

Tumbling, glassy waves drown out the noisy chatter, and the

Glistening shoreline beckons us nearer.

We almost bump into a large monk seal sleeping close by.

She lazily opens one eye to look at us,

We are instantly quiet and still.

The eldest in the group begins to chant from a respectful distance.

The students prepare their own chants in their heads and wait for the nod to

begin the chant to ask permission to enter the living classroom of the day…

They quietly notice her belly moving within…

a baby stirs in there, and mama warily opens her one eye once more.

At that moment, far off on the morning horizon,

A humpback whale breaches just beyond the mound of her stomach.

The synchronicity of the day begins to unfold in magic timing…and

Kapule smiles quietly to himself…today is going to be a good day.

Throw net neatly wrapped around his torso,

Tabis, worn and faded on his feet, sunglasses framing an

Incredibly handsome face roughly chiseled by

Suffrage, temperance and a long search for peace…

his large, exhausted eyes are the color of the ocean today.

He walks along the shoreline dotted with black rocks tumbled

smooth by many a storm.

He stops at a large round rock covered in coveted limu kohu…

he gently plucks a small ball while teaching how to

preserve the roots so more can grow for next time.

He scans the outer reef; sees the silver flash of fish just

under the surface of the shallow water out there.

The small group mimics his crouched approach to the school of fish and

I wonder how many of them arrived to school hungry today.

He casts the net wide and captures a large school of fat nenue.

He gathers up the full net and walks back to the shoreline while the children

Bounce behind him in excited victory!

Tossing the net on the sand, he opens it up;

Carefully picks out the flopping fish, drops them into the mesh net bag.  

The fish all have a very distinct flower pattern flashing on their skin…

a dotted series of sakura intensely black against silver scales.

Then fading as their open mouths gasp for oceanic air.

Walking back, the mesh bag sags heavy with the promise of

a fresh meal for empty bellies.

The van pulls into the school garden and

Kapule goes straight to the chili pepper bush,

plucks a couple and walks to the greenhouse.

He cuts stalks of green onion on the way.

Pulling out the limu kohu from his pocket, he places it in a bowl of water.

He teaches how to clean the Nenue and make ready for poke style cuts.

I see the hunger in the students’ eyes, they are patient, though.

he salts the chunks of fresh meat,

chops up the limu, pepper and onion,

mixes it in.

We sit at the table and fill our bellies with the fresh life of a simple fisherman’s meal.

We talk about the seal, the whale, the limu, and the flower pattern of the Nenue

and wonder as it all sinks deep into our bones.



Blue Hua moonrise over Kalalea Uka unfolded gently on

The eastern Anahola ocean.

It peeked through kukui leaves as it rose while

Conversations wove laughter and learning between us.

Ascended perfectly overhead and the

Supplication manifest on the lips…

‘A‘ahu mai lā me he kīhei lā.

You are adorned with a kīhei


He ‘a‘ahu nou e ha‘aheo ai

An adornment to wear with pride


I kupuohi…kupu ka mana‘o

Mature your thoughts


I kupukupu ‘onipa‘a

Surge (onward) resolutely


A laila holo pono ‘oe me nā ho‘omaika‘i ho‘i e!

Go forth righteously with goodness!

Soft warmth from the fire warmed us as

We wrapped up thoughts before

Sending it upward with all those souls moving through that

perfect ring of light encircling our beautiful moon.

~ KA 5/23/17

Grandmother Kalaiopuna

16105985_10210036885350202_7244205671118365808_nIn a sepia toned existence, she smiles the only expression ever known to me. There are but three pictures, fading now. Plus the scant recollections from my elders who lost you in their early adolescent years. And here you are today, in the first few pages of your eldest daughter’s oldest photo album opened up on her kitchen table. Such a silent, casual moment to come upon before breakfast.


We are home; preparing to celebrate 50 year marriage for my parents. It’s early June and the sun is shining in long beams of morning light through the dining room glass door. Outside the manicured yard glitters with dew, and a tiny mejiro bird alights on an extended palm frond near our kitchen table just outside the sliding screen door…the dew drops shiver through the light as they quickly fall to the mossy bricks laid there by my father’s hands so many years ago. Dad followed the same pattern with the same bricks his father laid between the orchid garden tables behind the Waianae house. The house was sold when Papa died in my adolescent years. Dad held on to these red bricks now glittering with water drops.


The years have fallen away just as quick. So much living held in a small drop of time. Irrecoverable, seemingly passing in slow motion at the time it was lived, but fading too quickly as preoccupation filled the next moment…and the next…until we reached this 50-year benchmark worthy of pulling up your beautiful smile of origins predating this longstanding marriage.


Such fleeting existence this all is.


Your unwavering presence, though, has never faltered. You have remained an ever present yet unseen backbone to so many moments of all of our lives. The perfect timing, the unfolding moments of family peace to enjoy time and time again…like two lucky stars over the heads of my parents, ever twinkling, never fading. This is who you are to me, Grandmother, Grandfather. I see you peeking through all the goodness, and I’m ever grateful.


~ KA 1/6/17